How to Keep Flirting At Work Harmless
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Is it okay to flirt with a colleague if you are married or in a steady relationship? The answer to this question lies in how you define flirtation. If indulging in friendly banter and jovial conversations without a serious sexual overtone is flirtation, it would be considered harmless. A playful giggle here, some gentle ribbing there, a quick chat by the watercooler are all safe, as long as both colleagues know their limits.
Why do it?
For fun, of course. Friendly flirting, in some sense, is like socialising. It helps lighten a tedious work environment and makes boring work tolerable. It also gives an ego boost — the feeling of acknowledgement and appreciation is priceless.
Does flirting at work equal infidelity?
“Flirting with mutual consent and within social boundaries is not a crime,” says Dr Samir Parikh, director, mental health and behavioural science, Fortis Healthcare. When both parties are aware of each other’s standings and marital commitments, and they agree that it is innocent, it is okay. So, if a married male colleague pays you a compliment about a rocking new pair of shoes, or if you admire his tie, it’s not infidelity. Indulging in witty conversation or cracking a silly joke shouldn’t translate into being inappropriate. In fact, it’s wrong to judge a colleague on this basis. “Some people are more outgoing by nature, that doesn’t mean they are out of line,” says Dr Parikh.
Where to draw the line?
Right where it gets controversial. The line is, of course, imaginary; there is no limit stated in the great books. It’s something you morally enforce upon yourself and swear never to cross. You have to rely on your conscience and ask yourself how much liberty would you allow your partner if they were in the same situation. Dr Parikh helps us identify the point at which we may breach our limits. “The moment you feel the need to be discreet, you should know there is something wrong,” he says. If you go home and can’t talk openly to your spouse about your interactions with colleagues, it’s time to think things through. Secrecy is never good, it leads to suspicion and hence complications.
Why do it?
For fun, of course. Friendly flirting, in some sense, is like socialising. It helps lighten a tedious work environment and makes boring work tolerable. It also gives an ego boost — the feeling of acknowledgement and appreciation is priceless.
Does flirting at work equal infidelity?
“Flirting with mutual consent and within social boundaries is not a crime,” says Dr Samir Parikh, director, mental health and behavioural science, Fortis Healthcare. When both parties are aware of each other’s standings and marital commitments, and they agree that it is innocent, it is okay. So, if a married male colleague pays you a compliment about a rocking new pair of shoes, or if you admire his tie, it’s not infidelity. Indulging in witty conversation or cracking a silly joke shouldn’t translate into being inappropriate. In fact, it’s wrong to judge a colleague on this basis. “Some people are more outgoing by nature, that doesn’t mean they are out of line,” says Dr Parikh.
Where to draw the line?
Right where it gets controversial. The line is, of course, imaginary; there is no limit stated in the great books. It’s something you morally enforce upon yourself and swear never to cross. You have to rely on your conscience and ask yourself how much liberty would you allow your partner if they were in the same situation. Dr Parikh helps us identify the point at which we may breach our limits. “The moment you feel the need to be discreet, you should know there is something wrong,” he says. If you go home and can’t talk openly to your spouse about your interactions with colleagues, it’s time to think things through. Secrecy is never good, it leads to suspicion and hence complications.
So, there ought to be certain boundaries, clearly demarking a ‘this much and no further’ point. “It’s important to draw a line, define it and highlight it, so that there are no chances of confusion,” says Dr Rajan Bhonsle, counsellor and consultant in sexual medicine. Often, unintended signals play with one’s psyche and turn a sweet relationship sour. And keeping the office environment in mind, the last thing you’d want is an unflattering reputation.
What’s beyond socialising?
Discomfort. So, before you reach this state, re-evaluate the dynamics of your working relationship, take corrective steps backwards and do not encourage faulty perceptions.
What’s beyond socialising?
Discomfort. So, before you reach this state, re-evaluate the dynamics of your working relationship, take corrective steps backwards and do not encourage faulty perceptions.
Original Source How to Keep Flirting At Work Harmless
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